Non Sequiturs + Other Quasi-Funny Stuff #14

UNINTENTIONAL HUMOR from the journalism realm — actual excerpts from stories published professionally on the Internet are in bold, along with brief commentary from me in non-bold … except for the items that seem self-explanatory.

ALL FIVE ITEMS BELOW ARE FROM …
THE DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT

1 — The Cowboys are coming off a very impressive home win over the St. Louis Rams, where they out-rushed the Rams 193-35 on the ground.

If you’re not a football fan, perhaps you’d like some help identifying the redundancy here. If so, here’s the spoiler — rushing the ball always takes place “on the ground” … so you can surmise correctly that there’s no need to refer to both “out-rushed” and “on the ground” in the above sentence.

2 — The reality is that the Dodgers have needed the left-hander to step up because of need.

3 — After a 10th-round knockout loss … he talked about retirement but elected to fight on and won his next four fights in a row before announcing that he was done.

Wondering where the redundancy is here? Look at the phrase “his next four fights in a row” and then ask yourself — isn’t “in a row” unnecessarily repetitive after “his next four fights”? If you’ve answered yes, I agree.

4 — A final last word for the Thunder was coming later that afternoon.

5 — The Broncos’ defense cashed in during a must-win that all the players said they had to have.

Hmm, a “must-win” that players said “they had to have” — a classic case of … yes, redundancy!

Until next time, remember to protect the football when you’re rushing on the ground.

— Bruce William Deckert 

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