Non Sequiturs + Other Quasi-Funny Stuff #15

01/23/2026

January 2026

The NFL’s Tampa Bay Buccaneers went 0-14 in their debut 1976 season.

During the campaign, a reporter asked Tampa Bay head coach John McKay about his team’s execution — in reply, he delivered this quick-witted quip: “I’m in favor of it.”

Safe to say, the reporter was asking how the Bucs were executing the coach’s strategy. Instead, McKay answered based on another meaning of the term execution — safe to say.

This is one of the legendary coach’s most famous quotes, according to Google Search, and the comment is frequently cited as a prototypical example of his dry wit and his propensity to find mirth in the face of adversity.

In 1979, the Buccaneers won the NFC Central under McKay and advanced to the NFC Championship Game, perhaps underscoring the popular saying: Good things come to those who wait.

Before coaching the Bucs, McKay served as head coach for the University of Southern California — following his lead, the USC Trojans won five Rose Bowls, tied for the most wins in Rose history. Four of his Rose Bowl wins came in national championship seasons for USC.

Let’s return to his legendary execution locution — here are three connected life-and-faith questions that might be considered impolite and irreverent and not-even-close-to-funny — yet I’ll forge ahead anyway:

• Have you ever puzzled over why some human governments employ capital punishment as state retribution for murder while others don’t?

• Have you ever contemplated the Canaan conquest in the biblical account of Joshua and feared the following query: Is the Creator of the universe — presumably the God of true love and the source of all goodness — somehow guilty of genocide?

• Have you ever been confounded about how the crucifixion (aka execution) of Jesus of Nazareth — a clearly sacrificial yet unspeakably brutal event — can truly be a sign of God’s love?

In other words: Insofar as God is the Father of humankind and the best Dad in the universe, how on earth could it be possible that He would require such a barbaric sacrifice from His beloved Son?

And one further query for good measure — what connection do you see between John McKay’s execution observation and the necessity for God’s new-creation execution to become the all-encompassing reality for we mere human beings?

After the above questions vis-à-vis suffering and justice, here’s a declarative statement to conclude this quasi-comical essay: As far as I can see, the final question in the previous paragraph references a far more foundational reality than the preceding problem-of-suffering queries.

In the immortal words of Linda Richman on the classic Saturday Night Live sketch “Coffee Talk” — talk amongst yourselves!

— Bruce William Deckert

FAST Sonnets in Cyberspace #1​​9

02/28/2025

February 2025

You know it’s so that You Are the answer —
despite what Allen Iverson’s tattoo
declares — since what the heavens say is true:
Still, do You have an answer, oh Chancer,
for every human question? Why cancer?
Why AIDS? Why bubonic plague? Why bird flu?
Why 9/11? And why World War II?
You know how whys multiply, Cross-Dancer —
yet whys also simplify and reduce:
For if we so-called wise mere humans try
to blame You solely for evil and pain,
isn’t the truth more complex and deduce-
-able at once — your Answer-Son’s dark cry —
You merit all credit for good and gain •

— Bruce William Deckert —

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Brevity: Soul of the Sonnet
The sonnet is perhaps the best poem format for cellphone-engrossed citizens of the 21st century — avoiding prolonged free verse, the sonnet offers a power-packed short-and-sweet read marked by a refreshing brevity — and is therefore ideal for a smartphone reading experience.

Sports C​onnection
​Since ​this blog focuses on faith​-and-sports​ topics, each FAST Sonnet in Cyberspace has a sports ​reference​ — for any non-basketball fans and the ​otherwise uninitiated​, Hall-of-Famer Allen Iverson​ was the first overall pick in the 1996 NBA ​draft​, the NBA Rookie of the Year, the NBA MVP after the 2000-01 season, the NBA’s ​season scoring ​champion four times, and the NBA’s season steals leader thrice — his nickname is The Answer, and he was the NBA​’s definitive AI before artificial intelligence became popularly known as AI.

AI Summary
Speaking of AI — the WordPress platform that hosts this blog offers an artificial-intelligence tool that summarizes a post — given a 50-word limit, here’s a mostly AI-generated synopsis for this post combined from three AI summaries — yet I’ve also revised and added to this summary, including the bold phrase:

“The poem explores profound existential questions about suffering and evil, prompting dialogue with a higher power — it contrasts the multiplicity of human inquiries, related to disease and wars and tragedies, with the simplistic tendency to blame God solely for pain, advocating for a nuanced view and questioning conventional atheistic beliefs.

My assessment of AI — based on the AI tools utilized in Google search and Gmail and ChatGPT — is that AI is sketchy at best and flat-out inaccurate too often. However, the above combined AI summary of this poem is on-target. Perhaps there’s hope for language-based AI, after all — but please, don’t bet your life on it.

BWD Summary
Here’s my BWD-generated 50-word prose summary of this poem — in case you missed it, my initials are BWD (Bruce William Deckert):

“Is God alone responsible for suffering and evil? If so, dare we try to disprove God’s existence — for if we mere humans blame a Creator for suffering, and then posit God’s nonexistence, here’s a compelling twin question: Who gets credit for good — and who can ​resolve our life-and-death dilemma?”

Sonnet Definition
This poem is an Italian sonnet — aka a Petrarchan sonnet — defined by the following structure:

• 14 Lines — all sonnets are comprised of 14 lines — and yes, a Google search revealing reliable sources agrees with this 14-line assessment.

• 10 Syllables Per Line — more technically, a sonnet is typically written in iambic pentameter, a pattern of 10 syllables per line featuring an unstressed syllable followed by a stressed syllable — these two connected syllables are called an “iamb” — and in this context “pentameter” refers to a line consisting of five iambs.

• Rhyme Scheme — while an Italian sonnet can have varying rhyme schemes, the typical rhyme scheme (or pattern or motif) features one eight-line octave and one six-line sestet, as follows: abbaabba cdecde — this differs from the English aka Skakespearean sonnet that features three four-line quatrains and a closing couplet with this rhyme scheme: abab cdcd efef gg

• Thanks for stopping by, and let’s close this complex post with what is likely a simple question — what is your understanding of who You refers to in this poem?

FAST Blast • 7th Anniversary and Stunning Award News

01/31/2025

January 2025

LET’S PLAY sports-and-faith word association — an appropriate game, we can all agree, for a blog that focuses on faith-and-sports topics.

The word: flood.

Your turn: What comes to mind when you consider the word flood?

Yes, it’s problematic to play a real-time rapid-fire word association game in writing rather than in-person — so in lieu of my turn, let’s give Google Search a turn. Here are the top five results for my search for “flood sports stories” — not in precise order, yet these are indeed the main results and articles for the above search:

• Flood opened the floodgates — A Rosa Parks Baseball: Inspiring Curt Flood’s Battle with Major League Baseball

• Copa del Rey games and other sporting events postponed after deadly floods devastate southern Spain

• Flood damage could make football club ‘go bust’

• Club Fest relocated to Kimmel after Paulson Center flood

• Altadena Athletes Need Our Help: Eaton Fire Relief Initiative — Local athletes and their families have lost everything • Your support today helps them get back in the game — from Southern California-based Flood Sports

Meanwhile, here’s a flood story from Today Publishing that has appeared in Today Magazine and Today Online — Flood Lessons: Churches Seek Answer To Age-Old Question Vermont Floods Spark Response To Neighbor Query

By the way, the term flood also applies — in a good way, I believe — to perhaps the most incredible development of my lifelong journalism-and-communication career. In case you haven’t heard, allow me to share once more this amazing professional news from 2024 that continues to astound and encourage me as 2025 begins.

That news is contained in this Today Publishing news story that has likewise appeared in Today Magazine and Today Online — Today Wins Most SPJ Awards Among CT Magazines68 Awards in 6 Years for Today Publishing

SPJ stands for the Society of Professional Journalists — in my mind, the SPJ is the nation’s preeminent journalism organization.

Today Publishing has been a necessity-is-the-mother-of-invention venture — I launched BWD Publishing seven years ago this month in the wake of my inclusion in a historic ESPN workforce reduction (aka layoff) in October 2015.

Today Publishing is the DBA name (doing business as) of BWD Publishing LLC. I rebranded this up-and-coming media outlet as Today Publishing and Today Magazine in 2019 after initially debuting Canton Today Magazine in October 2018, but this January is indeed the seventh anniversary of BWD Publishing.

For anyone who prefers to shun the seven-years-ago equation, the math is nonetheless simple: I established this media outlet in January 2018 after a hustling-and-bustling post-severance roller coaster ride that featured an 18-month contract role on the ESPN Digital Media copy desk, a part-time gig as a writer and editor for Best Version Media, and an athletic communications contract position at Quinnipiac University — yet no full-time employment offer came after a hustle-my-heart-out job search.

Given the clear need to pay the bills and the mortgage, I decided to be proactive and pioneer a new magazine in the Connecticut journalism realm rather than keep waiting for an already-established media outlet or corporate outfit to offer me a conventional job. I made this decision, as I recall, in the context of plenty of prayer for God’s guidance and much discussion with my family.

Regarding the award news: True, it is decidedly uncool to toot one’s own horn, especially to the exclusion of others, or in a foolish attempt to drown out the eminently worthwhile tunes of one’s neighbors — for as far as I can see, all we mere humans have and hold God-given gifts that are worth noting and celebrating.

Yet if the kindergarten show-and-tell exercise is any indication — and I believe this time-honored practice has significant merit — the desire to share good news reflects a common human longing. So I hope you’ll humor and indulge these prize-winning reflections.

Further, I would be sadly remiss if I didn’t voice the following: In light of these stunning accolades, I’m aiming to be grateful to all the teachers and professors and mentors and friends and family who have encouraged me and invested in my growth as a person and journalist over the years.

Speaking of floods: What’s your take on the Genesis account of Noah and his family and the Flood: accurate history or fairy-tale myth — or possibly somewhere in-between?

In the immortal words of Mike Myers as Linda Richman in the signature “Saturday Night Live” Coffee Talk sketch: “I’m getting a little verklempt — talk amongst yourselves!”

Bruce William Deckert

FAST Blast • Holiday Letter

12/31/2024

December 2024

THE HOLIDAYS are chock-full of traditions — in reverse alphabetical order, here are five: gift-giving, family get-togethers, delicious food, college football bowl games and Christmas caroling.

Another holiday tradition is the time-honored practice of sending a letter to apprise and update family and friends about relevant happenings of the past year — yes, this blog post is my offering of such a year-end newsletter for those who might be interested.

In alphabetical order, here’s my three-category summary of 2024 — and further back, since about 15 years have passed since I’ve written a similar holiday recap:

CAREER
Clearly, my career highlight in 2024 is the news that Today Magazine received more than twice as many awards as all other magazines in Connecticut in the Society of Professional Journalists (SPJ) contest.

I’ve worked in the media for most of my career, and in my mind the SPJ is the nation’s most prestigious journalism organization — the Connecticut SPJ Chapter presents awards annually through the Excellence in Journalism Contest.

Since I launched Today Publishing in 2018, in the wake of being included in a historic ESPN workforce reduction in 2015, I’ve produced 75 monthly magazines — and each year, Today has received encouraging SPJ award accolades.

However, to say that I’m surprised by this year’s award news is an understatement — our 2024 honors are beyond even my most hoped-for expectations for this still-fledgling but apparently up-and-coming media outlet.

FAMILY
From my perspective, 2024 has been a year of slow growth for me in the midst of the ongoing storm that engulfed my family a half-dozen years ago.

Remember the Oscar-nominated film “The Perfect Storm”? As far as I can see — and granted, seeing clearly in a storm is challenging — such a storm system hit my nuclear family in October 2018. Of course, the storm metaphor is an apt description of human history, even as sunny days sometimes provide a respite from the inevitable onslaught.

Really, a more apt title for the movie and my family’s real-life story since then would be “The Horrific Storm” — yet I continue to hope and pray as best I can that God will work all for good and turn this horrific storm into a perfect storm.

In my better moments, I believe only the Creator of the universe can transform our painful human histories and cause new-creation life to grow in the decaying soil of an old-world death that we mere humans cannot escape on our own.

GRATITUDE + GRIPES
Being grateful is surely an essential practice — and an indispensable life skill that we need God’s help to hone as a key way to temper life’s unavoidable hurts that give rise to gripes and complaints.

Safe to say, real life and real-life families are chock-full of reasons for both appreciation and complaints.

In some paradoxical way, being honest about life’s grievance- and injustice-prone reality goes hand-in-hand with realizing and growing in true gratitude. As far as I can see, apart from growth in appreciation, grievances alone result in an unforgiving death sentence — yet apart from honesty about said gripes and our need for change, appreciation alone can become a meaningless exercise in insipid and pollyannish platitudes.

Fans of the “Seinfeld” sitcom will likely recall Festivus, an alternative December holiday observed by George Costanza’s family that included an unconventional tradition: the Airing of Grievances. Again, while voicing gripes to the exclusion of gratitude is ultimately unhealthy, it appears to also be true that venting our dirty grievances and complaints in our Creator’s healthy and holy and clean air is somehow essential for our ultimate well-being — so the seemingly bizarre Airing of Grievances observance can serve a good purpose when coupled with a complementary Growth in Gratitude ritual stemming from a recognition of all the goodness we have to be grateful for.

Indeed, God’s people are told that they can counterintuitively rejoice in grief and suffering and injustice. Why? Because, in His steady surgical hand, these grievous hardships become tools He can utilize to shape us more and more into the new-creation humans He desires.

I confess, this rejoice-in-our-sufferings injunction doesn’t exactly compute in my mere human mind. However, given the alternative — suffering apart from a holy and finally health-giving divine intervention — I’ll take suffering with God, and God’s way, every day of the week and twice on Sunday.

At Christmastime, countless people worldwide celebrate the human-history invasion of Jesus of Nazareth, who bravely entered a storm-torn world as the amazing Bethlehem babe to accomplish the most daring rescue ever — according to historical documents that describe what many say is the Greatest Story Ever Told.

His birth was the prelude to His brutal execution on a Roman cross — an occasion that gave rise to arguably the greatest complaint ever recorded: “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me” — and this death was in turn the prelude to the jubilation and sure (yet cautious) optimism of His resurrection.

Our lives are chock-full of stories — better yet, our human lives are walking-and-talking stories. The journalism profession, of course, is dedicated to storytelling.

As the new year unfolds and beyond, my hope and prayer for you and for me is that our life stories will be enfolded in and ultimately told by the Person who, I believe in my better moments, is the Best Storyteller Ever as well as the Most Valuable Player and Person in human history — yes, Jesus, the One celebrated each holiday season as the stunning divine-and-human Son of God and Son of Man.

Cheers and peace to you and yours as this year ends and a new one begins.

Bruce William Deckert
— posted: December 31, 2024 — updated: January 3, 2025

Related News Today wins most SPJ awards among CT magazines

Related Posts
Best Player-Coach Ever — Bill Russell or First-Century Superstar?
Best Player-Coach Ever — Part 2
Best Player-Coach Ever — Part 3

FAST Sonnets • Super Bowl Haiku Trios

02/12/2024

February 2024

A Super Bowl Poem

Haiku Trio #1
So who said: “Winning
isn’t everything, it’s the
only thing” — always,

till today, brimming
with Super-football-frenzy-
-LVIII-Sunday,

I believed grinning
legendary Lombardi
coined the famed catchphrase •

Haiku Trio #2
Google search says yes,
he voiced this, but different coach
spoke the saying first —

so since, as we guess,
it’s too easy to wrong-broach
and/or poach our thirst

for true words and mess-
-become-marvelous approach —
will You sure un-curse •

Haiku Trio #3
“It’s a no-brainer” —
so says theist, pantheist
and atheist too —

“oh, to be saner,
just think as I do” (deist
also) — touchdown-true

real seems window-pane
clear? Thus we seem to profess
in midst of blue clues •

— Bruce William Deckert —

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haiku • definition — a brief poem of three lines — with five syllables in the first line, seven syllables in the second line, and five syllables in the third line

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POETRY NOTES

Poem Alert
This blog features five categories, including FAST Sonnets in Cyberspace — and yes, you’re right, the above poem is not a sonnet. However, since I’m not planning to introduce a new category called Haiku Trios in Cyberspace, this is the best place in the blog for a non-sonnet poem — let’s chalk it up to … poetic license.

Prose Explanation Awaits
Much could be said about what I’m attempting to communicate in the above series of haiku trios — I hope to take time to explain in prose someday more explicitly, but for now, this pithier poetic expression will have to suffice.

To Be Continued?
I’ll confess up front that I’ve failed to convey much of what I originally hoped to say, and I’m essentially dissatisfied with what I believe is a too-obscure message — yet I feel compelled and/or constrained to limit this haiku series to three sets of trios, and therefore I’ve run out of space. Yet here’s hoping I can continue exploring this theme with greater clarity someday in a follow-up series of haiku trios … or who knows, maybe even in a sonnet.

• Thanks for stopping by — and congratulations to the Kansas City Chiefs on their trio of Super Bowl wins with QB Patrick Mahomes in 2020, 2023 and now in 2024. Oh, he is also a three-time Super Bowl MVP. The Chiefs have won four Super Bowls overall, their first coming in 1970.

All-Name Teams #32

01/30/2024

​January 2024

Featuring names from across the world of sports

• “What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness” ― John Steinbeck

• “If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: If we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome” — Anne Bradstreet

• “Summer friends will melt away like summer snows, but winter friends are friends forever” ― George R.R. Martin

All-Winter Team 2
Nate Freese — football
Brenda Sue Frese — basketball
Garth Snow — hockey
Aron Winter — soccer
Quevyn Winters — basketball

All-Storm Team 2
Storm Barrs-Woods — football
Tavoris Cloud — boxing
Daniel Geale — boxing
Anthony McCloud — football
Sean Weatherspoon — football

Procedural Note
If you’re wondering why there are five people per team, the reason is elementary: Basketball was my favorite sport as I grew up, and since the rules of basketball — last time I checked — allow five players per team on the court, I’m going with five-person All-Name Teams

FAST Sonnets in Cyberspace #1​​8 

11/12/2023

November 2023

Fireflies light mind-and-heart reminiscence,​
​nightlife aglow with wonder at Grammy​
​and Pop-Pop’s countryside abode — condense​
​dazzling amazement in solitary​
​sonnet? Impossible — yet let’s still tr​y:
Chasing the lightning in one-acre yard,​
​catching the bright mites by crook as they fly —​
​place brilliant critters in punctured Ball jar​
​to be luminous sentries (while sleeping​
​in dark dreaming of stars) like radiant​
​angel-bards standing wordless guard — keeping​
​homestead safe, no chance creature accident — ​
oh, let these blinking beacons somehow be​
Your hope-signal for me and my family •​

© Bruce William Deckert ​2023

​+++

POETRY NOTES

• ​Sonnet ​Definition​
This is an English aka Shakespearean sonnet — a 14-line poem with 10 syllables per line, comprised of three four-line stanzas and a closing couplet, with th​e following rhyme scheme: abab cdcd efef gg​

• Sports Association
This blog focuses on sports-and-faith topics, so each FAST Sonnet in Cyberspace has a sports connection. ​I see ​at least two ​oblique sports theme​s here — chasing​ and ​catching​ suggest sports like football and soccer and basketball that sometimes require players to chase opponents and/or a ball.

• Storyworth Transplant
The above sonnet was first shared on the Storyworth​ website​ platform — my son and daughter gave me a Father’s Day gift last year that ​offers an opportunity to record stories and share them with family and friends​ — to those who read this poem first on Storyworth: can you identify the minor revisions in the above sonnet?

•​ Questions + Story-Answers
Storyworth​ sends a question prompt weekly to inspire the storyteller — most of my​ story-answers have been in the form of short poems.​ The question that inspired the above poem: What is one of your fondest childhood memories?​ Catching fireflies at my grandparents’ home in the countryside of western New Jersey —​ yes, this memory came to mind quickly​.

•​ Sonnet Succinctness​
The sonnet is​ perhaps the best poem​ structure for ​smartphone-distracted ​citizens of the 21st century — ​avoiding lengthy free verse, the sonnet offers a​ power-packed short-and-sweet reading experienc​e. Thanks for stopping by — and by the way, what’s your take on who Your refers to in the last line?

All-Name Teams #31

08/13/2023

August 2023

Featuring names from across the world of sports

• In the name of love — what more in the name of love?
—Pride: In The Name Of Love — song by U2

• Deny thy father and refuse thy name … ’Tis but thy name that is my enemy … O, be some other name … What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other word would smell as sweet … doff thy name and, for thy name, which is no part of thee, take all myself •
—Juliet — from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet

• And it’s all in the name of love
—In the Name of Love — song by Bebe Rexha and Martin Garrix
—see more lyrics below

All-Love Team #1
Vagner Love — soccer
Peter Lovenkrands — soccer
Lovie Smith — football
Amare Stoudemire — basketball
Bobby Valentine — baseball

All-Love Team #2
Eden Hazard — soccer
Lisa Love — athletic director
Yeardley Love — lacrosse
Jamie Lovemark — golf
Lovemore N’dou — boxing

All-Nuclear Family True Love Team
• listed in reverse birth order
Kayla Anneliese — basketball, lacrosse, soccer, softball
Luke George — baseball, basketball, soccer, softball
Mina Elizabeth — basketball, soccer, softball
Bruce William — baseball, basketball, soccer, softball

Procedural Note
• If you’re wondering why there are five people per team, with the exception of the All-Nuclear Family True Love Team, the rationale is simple — basketball was my favorite sport as I grew up, and since the rules of basketball allow five players per team on the court, I’m going with five-person All-Name Teams

• Meanwhile, if you’re wondering why the All-Nuclear Family Team — aka the All-Connecticut Deckert Team — has four people instead of five, apparently you don’t know my family especially well

• This Deckert family was established in August 1988, so this All-Name team is posted in honor of the 35th anniversary of that momentous and amazing occasion — more recently, Mina has legally changed her last name, yet I consider this circumstance to be a footnote in the history of our family that is hardly worth mentioning •

If you’d like to understand my family and my family’s history better, just let me know and we can swap family stories — my family comprises some amazing stories, and I imagine your family’s stories are amazing too •

— Bruce William Deckert

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Song Note
• This song came on my radar only in the past week or so — these lyrics strike me and resonate with me and impress me as being reflective of the true love rooted in the Creator of the universe, so I share them with you vis-a-vis these All-Love Name Teams •

In the Name of Love
—song by Bebe Rexha and Martin Garrix

If I told you this was only gonna hurt
If I warned you that the fire’s gonna burn
Would you walk in?
Would you let me do it first?
Do it all in the name of love

Would you let me lead you even when you’re blind?
In the darkness, in the middle of the night
In the silence, when there’s no one by your side
Would you call in the name of love?

If I told you we could bathe in all the lights
Would you rise up, come and meet me in the sky?
Would you trust me when you’re jumping from the heights?
Would you fall in the name of love?

When there’s madness, when there’s poison in your head
When the sadness leaves you broken in your bed
I will hold you in the depths of your despair
And it’s all in the name of love

I wanna testify
Scream in the holy light
You bring me back to life
And it’s all in the name of love

In the name of love — name of love
In the name of love — name of love

FAST Sonnets in Cyberspace #1​7

05/31/2023

May 2023

CAN A TRIP TO THE BATHROOM inspire a poem — and is poetry intended only for English classes and literature textbooks?

To find out, you’re invited to read this newest post from A Slow Life in the FAST Lane:

• Let’s get this clear — the best poetry isn’t meant for English-major types and literary elites, but rather for everyone — after all, I believe every human being is a living story and poem and movie script, all rolled into one — do you believe this too?

• The vocational pastor of the New Jersey church where I grew up, Julian Alexander, spoke about a line from the Ephesians letter — “For we are God’s workmanship aka masterpiece aka handiwork” — and explained that the Greek word utilized here is poēma … and yes, this Greek term is the root of the English word poem

• On a Sunday morning in my teenage youth, he told our Willow Grove church assembly of humans: “You are God’s poem — let that blow your mind”

• What he didn’t say then, as far as I recall, is that every human being will choose whether they want to be God’s unraveled new-creation human poem (aka a good poem) or a twisted old-creation human poem (aka a bad poem) — and this human decision, dovetailing mutually with God’s decision, will essentially determine each person’s destiny — and while he didn’t explain that on the Sunday in question, I believe this is a key corollary facet of the poēma reality … and certainly, this is is what many witnesses have proclaimed for centuries

• See the Poetry Notes below for definitions of a few words and some related thoughts connected to the following sonnet — aka poetic human message — that is meant for everyone who cares to read further…

Yes, you are invited to join in as I aim to share here part of my journey that somehow dovetails with everyone’s human journey — and I invite you to share your journey too, as you so choose, whether in the “Leave a Comment” section or via another blog platform or otherwise:

+++

OUTDOOR COMMODE — take a hike and a leak —
and bluebird flits to bathroom … I wonder
now: How did Adam name fauna — unique
names for each, creative nomen-thunder-
-clature — sum-times seems Greek to me — and some
question: Did one dude truly give beast-names
to animals — snout, beak, trunk, nose knows — dumb
one and all? So chic — yet do creature-claims
here on earth speak surely of One Divine
Son’s freakish-geekish seeking artistry,
proclaim loudly sans words as stars align
with — and are peak signs of — Mary’s weakly
spoken Word … as clearly as Narnian
persons, one for all, voice-christen Aslan?

© Bruce William Deckert • May 2023

+++

— POETRY NOTES —

DEFINING TERMS
In a brief poem, surely every word counts — in that light, following is a brief glossary of words that might be less familiar, in the order they appear, with definitions from online dictionaries that correspond with their usage in the sonnet above:

commode • noun — toilet

flit • verb — to pass quickly or abruptly from one place to another

fauna • noun — animal life: especially, the animals characteristic of a region, period or special environment

nomen-thunder-clature • noun — you can search for this word in the dictionary, but don’t expect to find it because I came up with the term on the spot, as a playful variation of the word “nomenclature” — the immediate goal was to rhyme with “wonder” and the added benefit of this made-up hyphenated word is the intimation of the apparently powerful and thunderous aspect of the naming process

nomenclature • noun — name, designation — the devising or choosing of names

chic • adjective — cleverly stylish — currently fashionable

chic • noun — stylishness and elegance, typically of a specified kind — a faddishly popular stylishness or appeal

sans • preposition — without

Narnian • adjective — related or pertaining to Narnia

Narnia • proper noun — a made-up magical land conceived by C.S. Lewis via his seven-book series The Chronicles of Narnia — a domain populated by talking animals and mythical creatures and properly ruled by human beings under Aslan’s ultimate authority

Aslan • proper noun — the main character of The Chronicles of Narnia, a talking lion who is the Creator and One True King of Narnia, the Great Lion, the King above all High Kings in Narnia, the Son of the Emperor-Beyond-The-Sea — derived from the Turkish word for lion — in the world of Narnia, Aslan corresponds to Jesus of Nazareth as He is presented and described and proclaimed in the New Testament documents, rooted in the Old Testament documents, and attested by multiple other historical sources — the same One who is called the Son of God and Son of Man, the Highest Authority and King in the universe who has and holds the Name above all names

ORIGIN STORY
The seed for this poem originated and was planted, as I recall, in the early summer of 2022 just as I began a walk-and-talk with a longtime colleague on the Farmington River Trail in Collinsville, Connecticut.

While this sonnet doesn’t explicitly mention the creation-evolution debate, this apparent dispute is intrinsically connected to the poem’s theme — indeed, this debate-dispute-discourse has engulfed and fascinated our society and academia since Charles Darwin published​ “On the Origin of Species​” more than 150 years ago.

Darwin’s book was printed and disseminated in 1859 — at least, most historians and scientists and literary types seem to universally agree this is the year his evidently influential work was produced. Yet how can we know this is accurate aka true?

Let’s consider this question and revisit it another time.

And if you’re wondering: When I refer to “Origin Story” — yes, the pun regarding human origins is both intended and inherent.

DEFINING SPORTS
Since this blog focuses on faith-and-sports topics, each post in FAST Sonnets in Cyberspace has a sports connection, naturally — in this case, hiking.

But is hiking a sport? Most online sources I found via a Google search for “is hiking a sport” say the answer is no. Do you agree?

In my opinion, many human endeavors that aren’t necessarily considered sports can be turned into a game — so in my book, yes, hiking can be considered a sport.

Another more oblique sports connection is the reference to “Greek” in the sonnet’s fifth line — given the link between Greece and Olympic history.

SONNET SCHOOL
What is a sonnet, exactly? Given my experience as an English major and high school English teacher, I thought I knew the essentially definitive answer.

However, as I researched the term sonnet while writing this post, I learned how much more there is to learn about the amazing and classic and intense and magical and splendid communication form known as the sonnet.

So to understand more, let’s go to school — and as the best philosophers and dictionary publishers advise, let’s define terms — in this case by visiting the impromptu FAST Sonnet School:

sonnet • noun — 14-line poem with 10 syllables per line and a specific pattern of rhymes at the end of each line — this definition is my paraphrase and a compilation of several dictionary definitions

Word to the Wise — If you are satisfied with the definition of sonnet in the previous paragraph, you may disembark from this amusement-park ride now — however, if you choose to stay on this roller-coaster train, please buckle your seatbelt and remain seated for the rest of this topsy-turvy linguistic journey:

• The 10 syllables per line can be described as iambic pentameter — and in the next two bullet points you will find (hopefully) simpler explanations of these two potentially obscure literary terms

• The word iambic is listed in Merriam-Webster.com as an adjective or noun — with the apparent root word iamb — and an iamb is a group of two syllables, consisting of one short syllable and one long syllable

• In this usage, the word pentameter refers to a line of poetry comprised of five iambs — equaling 10 syllables — and the prefix penta- comes from the Greek term pénte — or five, per Dictionary.com

Shakespearean Sonnet — Among the various types of sonnets, a Shakespearean or English sonnet features three four-line stanzas (aka quatrains) and a closing couplet — the above poem is essentially a Shakespearean sonnet, albeit with a modified and unconventional closing couplet

• Various sonnet types have various rhyme repetitions, known as a rhyme scheme — that is, the pattern or sequence of rhymes at the end of each line — and Shakespearean aka English sonnets have the following rhyme scheme — abab cdcd efef gg

Sonnet Origins — The word sonnet is derived from the Old Occitan term sonet that means “little song” per online sources — Occitan is a Romance language spoken in southern France and parts of northwest Italy and northern Spain, according to various sources — a Romance language is a language that developed from Latin, such as French or Italian or Spanish, per Merriam-Webster.com

• In my view, the sonnet is one of the best poetic structures for the time-challenged and smartphone-distracted residents of the 21st century — instead of lengthy and time-consuming and potentially laborious free verse, the sonnet offers a brief power-packed literary roller coaster •

Here’s hoping you’ve enjoyed the ride!

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— MORE POETRY NOTES —
— If you have time to keep reading further fascinating info —

SONNET REVISIONS
More than one writing guru has extolled revising and rewriting as a virtue — comparable to tending a garden through pruning and weeding.

• “Rewriting is the essence of writing well: it’s where the game is won or lost” — so says William Zinsser in “On Writing Well: The Classic Guide to Writing Nonfiction” — and by the way, I’ll say the same principle applies to fiction, poetry and every other type of written message, as far as I can see •

• Revising a sonnet is a special exercise — language is jam-packed with so many latent and abundant and multi-layered meanings that can barely be contained in prose •

• With poetry — and especially the friendly and disciplined confines of a sonnet — each word counts exponentially … perhaps exponentially is a hyperbolic term here, but surely every single syllable in a sonnet costs more, coming at a higher premium than a prose-used syllable or word, so a one-word change can be monumental •

• Several lines in this sonnet experienced revisions and makeovers as I transplanted this poem, so to speak, from the original handwritten version in an old-school maroon notebook to a Pages word-processing document on a MacBook Air and then to WordPress — here are a few before-and-after revisions, with the changes underlined:

Original
…and some / question: Did one dude truly give these names / to animals with snout, beak, trunk, nose — dumb / One and all? Come to think, do creature-claims…

After — Take 1
…and some / query: Did man verily give beast-names / to animals with snout, beak, trunk … knows? Dumb / one and all? So chicyet do creature-claims…

After — Take 2
…and some / question: Did one dude truly give beast-names / to animals — snout, beak, trunk, who knows — dumb / one and all? So chic — yet do creature-claims…

After — Take 3 — in the sonnet above
…and some / question: Did one dude truly give beast-names / to animals — snout, beak, trunk, nose knows — dumb / one and all? So chic — yet do creature-claims…

———

Original
…proclaim loudly without words — stars align…

After — Take 1 — in the sonnet above
…proclaim loudly sans words as stars align…

———

Original
…as clearly as Narnian / persons, one and all, point to Aslan?

After — Take 1 — in the sonnet above
…as clearly as Narnian / persons, one for all, voice-christen Aslan?

———

In my opinion, the revised sonnet is better for these makeovers — what is your opinion? Feel free to share your perspective via the “Leave a Comment” link below.

TRAIL MAP FOLLIES + FORESIGHT
Here’s a brief note regarding the nomenclature — in other words, the name — of the Farmington River Trail referenced toward the top of these Poetry Notes, in the “ORIGIN STORY” section:

Upon further review, I checked Google Maps and encountered some confusing designations and multiple trail names — confusing to me, anyway. An ironic twist, given the naming theme of this poem.

According to the Google map that’s on my computer screen as I type these words, this popular pathway isn’t actually called the Farmington River Trail in Collinsville, a distinct village of the town of Canton, Connecticut — not to be confused with Canton, Ohio home of the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

This iconic rails-to-trails boulevard has at least three names in Canton, per Google Maps. Yes, it bears the Farmington River Trail moniker from the Canton Shops on Route 44 going west to River Road aka Route 179 — but then the trail takes a sharp left-hand turn and heads south into Collinsville.

Appropriately, this section of the pathway is called the Collinsville Walking Trail per Google Maps and runs into historic Collinsville, taking a slight left-hand turn as it crosses Route 179 — in another potentially confusing twist, this section of 179 is no longer River Road but rather Bridge Street.

Here, the third trail name comes into play — the Farmington Valley Trail runs concurrently with a Main Street sidewalk, the online map indicates, though only for a stone’s throw after taking that slight left off Bridge Street, and then continues south toward the trail’s footbridge over the Farmington River.

Aren’t you glad you visited A Slow Life in the FAST Lane today?

The next time you’re playing a trivia game and the topic is the trail system in Canton, Connecticut, you’ll be as prepared as a Boy Scout or Girl Scout and you’ll be ready to come to the rescue of your trivia team, like the Coast Guard — for the Guard’s service motto is Semper Paratus, aka Always Ready!

If you wonder how I know this, the answer is twofold:

• 1 — My son is a health-care professional in the Coast Guard, a domestic-focused military affiliate and the only branch of the U.S. Armed Forces in the Department of Homeland Security.
• 2 — As a fact-checking safeguard, I confirmed this motto info via the U.S. Coast Guard Academy website.

THE DEFINING WORD
By the way, my experience is that Google’s maps are helpful, but far from foolproof. The broader category here is the following: Technology is awfully beneficial, except when it isn’t — and especially when it’s awfully harmful.

The Google Maps platform is surely and sorely in this ballpark — Google’s maps are quirky and tricky in such a way that while they can shine light and point in the right direction, they can likewise mislead and misdirect.

As far as I can see, this is the common human experience with virtually all written and visual communication — from the CDC’s COVID guidance, to the instructions accompanying an assembly-required Christmas gift, to a computer manual, to a coach’s work-hard-and-always-hustle injunction, to the Bible itself.

To those who belong to the Church: Are you questioning whether the Bible — aka God’s Word — can be misleading?

Absolutely, the Church affirms that the Bible will shine light on our path throughout our earthly sojourn — yet mis-utilized, the Bible will shine light on the absolute wrong path — and that pathway will lead not to eternal life but to destruction, the Church asserts.

Who and what is the source of such a haunting yet hopeful assessment of the Scriptures, aka the sword of the Spirit?

• First, the “what” answer — the very Bible that the Church proclaims as the written Word of God carries this caveat like an insidious parasite on a viable and healthy living organism: Remember the account of Jesus’ temptation in his biographies ascribed and attributed to Matthew and Luke — commonly known as the Gospels according to Matthew and Luke?

What did Jesus’ enemy quote in a direct attempt to trip up Jesus so He would not only fall — and crash-and-burn — but also fail miserably in His human-and-divine rescue mission?

God’s sworn enemy — who is said to be hell-bent on forever harming and never benefiting human beings — directly quoted God’s own written Word as an apparently viable way to derail Jesus … like a terrorist planting a destructive bomb that somehow appears to be a healing balm on a passenger airplane.

Yes, God’s Google Maps tool — known as the holy and healing and ultimately health-giving Scriptures, aka the Holy Bible — can equally be an unholy and poisonous and ultimately harmful map tool when utilized inaccurately and mistakenly, whether in a naively unwitting way or a deliberately deceitful way.

Mind-boggling and maddening, yes — yet also a sad but true reality, as far as I can see.

Some classic lyrics by gifted songsmith Bruce Cockburn — a poem-spinning and storytelling Canadian treasure among countless other Canadian treasures — apply here:

• Sunset is an angel weeping
Holding out a bloody sword —
No matter how I squint I cannot
Make out what it’s pointing toward

Sometimes the best map will not guide you —
You can’t see what’s round the bend —
Sometimes the road leads through dark places —
Sometimes the darkness is your friend •

—Bruce Cockburn • Pacing The Cage

• Second, the “who” answer — Jesus of Nazareth Himself is the source of this assessment of the Scriptures.

The Bible proclaims Him not only as God’s incarnate-and-crucified-and-risen Son, but also as the human-and-divine Living Word who can and will properly arbitrate and elucidate and translate God’s human-and-divine written word, aka the Bible. Remember, when He was presented with a presumably wise course of action via God’s written word — by His sworn enemy — He resisted the persuasive temptation by appealing to, yes, God’s written word. In other words, Jesus knows the proper timing and the correct interpretation regarding how and when to apply the Bible’s written instructions.

To those who don’t belong to the Church: Are you questioning whether the Bible is reliable at all and whether Jesus’ victory over death in sudden-death overtime — aka His Easter resurrection, as described and defined in the New Testament — is a reality?

Vis-à-vis my doubts, in my best moments I believe that Jesus of Nazareth is essentially the Most Real Person in the universe and thus the Best Person to ultimately follow and listen to and trust on our shared flesh-and-blood journey — and He’s the Ultimate Best Teacher to ask the questions posed in this blog post, along with every other question that has ever been asked or ever will be asked by we mere human beings who desperately and surely need His new-creation solution for the life-and-death questions and conundrums we inevitably face in our human quest to discover the meaning and message of life.

In other words: Jesus is the decisive Person and the defining Word across human history.

To all those who belong to the human race:
What do you believe about the value of poetry and storytelling, and the meaning of life, and the life-and-death reality of Jesus of Nazareth?

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If you’ve read this far — thank you and kudos to you!

Thanks for taking the time to stop by… and it’s safe to say I got carried away with this blog post, by far the lengthiest FAST Sonnets in Cyberspace entry in the history of A Slow Life in the FAST Lane.

+++

In February, I also got carried away (so to speak) when I penned by far the lengthiest publisher’s Leading Off column in the brief history of Today Publishing — here is that commentary article:

Contemplating marriage, divorce and genocide

For those who don’t know, I produce a monthly publication called Today Magazine via my role as publisher and editor-in-chief of Today Publishing — in a significant way, this has been a necessity-is-the-mother-of-invention venture marked by many twists and turns and ups and downs. Yes, the roller-coaster metaphor comes to mind again.

Another metaphor occurs to me: If ESPN Digital Media — one of my former employers— is a 20-something media empire of sorts, Today Publishing is a mere preschooler among media outlets.

ESPN Digital Media is the rebranded newer identity of ESPN. com, the website that launched in April 1995, and therefore the math is clear — ESPN Digital Media turned 28 years old last month. Meanwhile, Today Publishing turned 4 years old in October 2022.

​Today Magazine t​ied 50-year-old Connecticut Magazine​ — perhaps the state’s most well-known publication —​ for the most first-place mag awards in the Society of Professional Journalists contest in 2022.
Today Magazine wins 12 more SPJ awards

Today Publishing debuted with Canton Today Magazine in October 2018, added Avon Today and Simsbury Today in April 2019, and then combined as tri-town Today Magazine in July 2019 before branching out as a full-fledged Farmington Valley publication in July 2020 — covering the heart of the Valley and recording the underreported upside of the Valley community.

We focus on these five core Valley towns — Avon, Canton, Farmington, Granby and Simsbury — yet our news coverage encompasses and includes and incorporates Greater Hartford and Greater Torrington and, in significant ways, the entire state of Connecticut as well as all of New England, the entire United States and the far-flung global human community on planet Earth.

Yes, Today Publishing covers the heart of the Farmington Valley via community news that matters nationwide and worldwide.

How is our coverage national and global, you ask?

Here’s one simple answer — we’ve featured a cover story about adoption in October 2022 and about foster care in May 2023. Correct me if I’m wrong: These two topics are national, global and universal in scope … in my opinion, anyway. What is your opinion?

Today Publishing is the DBA name (doing business as) of BWD Publishing LLC, the media outlet I established in January 2018. Our first publication appeared nine months later.

Take care, Godspeed, and onward and upward in this proverbial journey of life and storytelling +

© Bruce William Deckert • May 2023

FAST Fiction: Fall Classic Dream State #13

02/28/2023

Posted — February 2023

What happens to a dream deferred?
— Langston Hughes

Somewhere out there someone’s saying a prayer
That we’ll find one another in that big somewhere out there
… Somewhere out there, if love can see us through
Then we’ll be together somewhere out there
Out where dreams come true
— Linda Ronstadt & James Ingram — Somewhere Out There

Synchronized with the rising moon
Even with the evening star
They were true love written in stone
…Oh, yes, other hearts were broken and other dreams ran dry…
— James Taylor — Never Die Young

Fall Classic Dream State:
Part 123456789101112

Once upon a couch, I was home watching the pregame show before the decisive game of the 2000 World Series — the Mets-Yankees Subway Series — but I fell asleep just before the first pitch, and soon I began to dream…

In this surreal yet seems-so-real dream — paradoxically haunting-and-hopeful and lucid-and-confusing and real-life-and-trance-like — I’ve been whisked from one location to another in an astounding narrative…

…from my couch in a Connecticut Cape-Cod-style home to New York City, from the pinnacle of the Empire State Building to a strange parade in the Canyon of Heroes along Broadway, from the Bronx to the 9/11 crash site of United Airlines Flight 93 in western Pennsylvania close to Shanksville — indeed, a shank to human hearts, uniting everyone on board in the spasm of death and the chasm between a seemingly unknown afterlife and the aspiration of a hoped-for and dreamed-of new creation destination.

9/11, you ask? Yes, my whisking dream-induced journey has included time travel — when I fell asleep, I was watching the 2000 World Series on Fox TV and listening to broadcasters Joe Buck and Tim McCarver, but in the proverbial twinkling of an eye I witnessed the Twin Towers implode on September 11, 2001 and then watched the plummeting and exploding of Flight 93.

The time travel continues, for after being present on 9/11, I was taken to Yankee Stadium during Game 7 of the 2004 American League Championship Series — and according to the prophetic headline at the NYC Canyon-of-Heroes parade, the Red Sox routed the Yankees in Game 7 in the Bronx to complete a historic comeback from a 3-0 series deficit, the first time in Major League Baseball history that a team accomplished this feat.

How on earth could this have happened, I wonder, shaking my head — speaking of surreal dreams, how can we be sure this Red Sox resurrection actually occurred?

And now, suddenly, I’ve been transported from the 2004 ALCS Bronx massacre to a farm-and-barn converted into a church in Connecticut’s Farmington Valley — on my wedding day, of all blazing-amazing summer days, at a breathtaking outdoor sanctuary adjacent to a sure-flowing stream and woodland wonderland.

However, in a paparazzi flash my bride and I have disappeared and the temperature has plummeted to sub-freezing. The woodland has instantly turned into a winter wonderland — except for a glaring issue: I’ve never seen a winter wonderland that resembles a crime scene. Where my bride and I were standing on that distant summer’s day, three dark-blue baseball caps lay where our feet had trod … a Boston Red Sox cap with the classic red B and a New York Yankees cap with the interconnected white N-and-Y — and a third cap in-between with the NY and the B interlocked as three joined superimposed letters.

Why is this an apparent crime scene? Underneath the three caps, a blood-red mark in the shape of a heart stains the virgin snow near the bottom of the gentle slope where the seats and witnesses at this outdoor sanctuary rise and fall.

At the top of the slope, the tallest woman I’ve ever seen begins to descend the stairway toward where I stand hard by the heart-shaped stain — clearly, she would be the most imposing center in the WNBA. She somehow resembles a larger version of my bride, but besides the gargantuan size, another off-putting anomaly betrays that this isn’t my better half but rather an impostor.

As I try to pinpoint the anomaly, in my peripheral vision I see ancient Miracle Max of “The Princess Bride” — he’s back again, and now he’s running in circles in the snow on the outdoor podium, chased by an equally ancient woman.

Max cries out to her, “Get away, witch” — but she replies, “I’m not a witch, I’m your wife!”

When I look back at the WNBA-sized giant lady descending the stairs, I see more clearly not only her beauty but also her terrifying cruel bearing and her royal scarlet robe and her lily-white skin, which jars me to recognition — indeed, this must be Queen Jadis of Narnia, the infamous White Witch. Then I faintly hear a woman’s cold words in my mind, though the Witch’s lips remain motionless, intoning in a mocking sing-song voice: “Always winter, but never Christmas — always winter, but never Christmas — always winter, but never Christmas!”

Miracle Max has stopped running from his wife and instead is staring — no, glaring — at the White Witch, and he says:
“Kid, be careful — this broad is bad news through and through.”

Then, in a moment that seems simultaneously like eons and a sneeze’s swift expulsion-propulsion, I’m transported to an indoor auditorium in New Jersey — I can somehow sense that I’m in the Garden State, even though Bruce Springsteen’s “Born to Run” isn’t being piped over the intercom. Instead, Mrs. C is announcing my name over a loudspeaker. I pick up a mimeographed program from a banquet table and peer at the header — An Evening With the English Classes of The Covenant Master’s School • Fanfield, New Jersey — and I see my name next to: “Dreams” by Langston Hughes.

Mrs. C calls my name once … twice … three times — but no dice. I try to reply and say “I’m here” but that disconcerting and disturbing dream-turned-to-nightmare phenomenon is occurring as we speak, so to speak — namely, try as I might, I can’t speak at all. Against my will, I’m muzzled and mute.

So instead of me reciting the fabled Langston Hughes poem, an unidentified young man steps to the microphone — my gut conveys an unsettling sensation to my heart as his quasi-blondish locks glisten in the artificial inside light — and he reads these lines in a certain calculated way:

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.

Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.

Why was I unable to voice the poet’s dream lines?

Earlier that day, after the Covenant baseball game where I played center field and batted leadoff, my Dad took my alter ego to dinner at a Chinese restaurant in Plainwood, my hometown and Fanfield’s neighboring city, and we lost track of time — or time lost track of us — or we simply ignored the ticking onslaught of time.

Instantaneously, Miracle Max transports me back to the frozen outdoor wedding venue — in-between bites of a fortune cookie — at least, I believe Max was the human conductor.

The White Witch is now standing beside me, towering over me, and when Max turns his gaze toward me, his face contorts in shock and horror and he shouts: “Hey kid, what happened to you — you’re looking beastly!”

Glancing at my hands, instead of human appendages I see hideous fur-covered paws featuring claws rather than fingernails. The immediate association that springs into my mind and memory is unmistakable — beastly, indeed — I’ve evidently become the antagonist-protagonist fusion from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast.

+++

By the way, momentarily returning to the summer scene, blazing is surely an accurate description of that mid-90s August wedding day — mid-90s not in years but in degrees. Indeed, no wedding would be complete without the Murphy’s Law factor coming into play — when the bride and groom selected tuxedos the winter before, the tux salesman failed to illuminate that the tux they chose was intended for a freezing-cold day as opposed to a sweltering summertime day.

Can you guess the seasonal fashion gaffe this soon-to-be bride and groom inadvertently made?

Here’s a hint: sheep-shearing.

Given this hint and your innate human power of deduction, if you surmise that this nuptial-planning couple picked out wool tuxedos, you are correct — yes, wool tuxedos that five groomsman and two Dads and the groom wore by necessity in the midst of the dog days of summer.

At day’s end, the groom’s Dad — who would sweat buckets sitting stationary in a T-shirt in humid heat — took off an utterly drenched and soaked-through tuxedo. It appeared he had worn the tux while swimming in the Sanchiz’s pool back home in Plainwood … or so he wished, by George!

Meanwhile, back at the frigid outside sanctuary, my true bride and my true self are still nowhere in sight.

To be continued

© Bruce William Deckert 2023


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